i am here

and…. here we go. the title is a good place to start. anybody who has ever started a blog will probably tell you it’s also the hardest place to start. the options are endless. and the pressure to make a “good one” is exceeding. On Afternoons and Coffeespoons is an old blog I had while in varsity. The line is stolen from a Crash Test dummies song. But really, it comes from that beautiful T.S. Eliot poem.

here i am. preparing my face to meet the faces I will meet. walking through decisions, visions and revisions. There is time. To wonder, “do I dare?”…”Do I dare disturb the universe?” Will I, after tea and cakes and tasting life and materiality and things and stuff, have the strength to force the moment to its crisis? Or will I need to weep and fast and weep and pray that someone else, someone greater than I, makes it worthwhile

i am valerie. i am passionate. i am daughter, sister, wife, friend. i am loved/loving. i am trying. i am…justice. it is written on my arms, my forehead, my heart. it drives me. i am HIS. and HE is I AM. I. Am. I am… Mostly though, I am here. So i’ll write as the thoughts come and the urgency rises. I’ll write what i please (and punctuate in the same way – not out of laziness, but because the words are more important than their form except where their form breathes the words). I do not promise to write regularly. Or even well. If you choose to follow this blog, follow at my leisure. I will write the things I see, breathe, feel, love, despise. The things which stir in me passion, urgency, desire, and despair. The things which make me weep, pray, act, act out, angry, and hopeful. i’ll write. i am here.

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